"It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to." -- JRR Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
This is one of my favorite quotes. I adore it as a metaphor for life, whether Bilbo meant it as such. It embodies the mixed emotions of excitement, fear, and hopeful anticipation related to the start of new adventures. The best part about new adventures is that one can begin at any time. Every morning can be like this! Even though there are certain milestones in life that I planned for, like graduating from school, starting a new job, or moving to a new city across the country, often it's the unexpected twists and turns in life that (usually in retrospect) give so much character to my existence. Often, also, such new adventures begin with my making the willful decision to move toward a particular direction with a mindset like Dory's perceptive statement, "If you never let anything happen to [you], then nothing will ever happen to [you]."
These thoughts about life and adventures stem from events that happened over the weekend. On Saturday, I signed a 3-year lease for a brand new Prius C. It's a very cute car, smaller than my previous hatchback, and while driving a hybrid is different, I have been enjoying the change. I noticed that I'm paying more attention to my speedometer, and I'm continually amused by the tiny, animated illustration of how much power I'm using and charging. I've also noticed that I'm driving a whole lot before the fuel indicator eventually decreases by one tick, which is awesome; but the one particular thing that I'm paying most attention to is the odometer. In a nutshell, this new lease has a mileage cap that is less than my previous one; unintentionally, I accepted the terms without thoroughly calculating how much driving I will actually be doing.
Worrying about this situation and wondering if I should call the dealership to possibly extend my mileage, I suddenly remembered a nearly identical predicament that I was in 3 years ago when I signed the lease for the Scion XD. That same anxiety about going over my mileage was a big deal at the time, because I was living in San Jose and commuting everyday to Palo Alto for work. Little did I know that my job at Stanfurd would end after 4 short months, and that it would be 8 months of unemployment before I begin working at my current job in Sunnyvale, where I eventually moved. Needless to say, I didn't go over my mileage. In fact, when I turned her in, she was almost 20k below the limit. All that worrying turned out to be pointless and a waste of mental energy.
Life changes so quickly, so unexpectedly as it tends to do. Looking back on the last 3 years, so much has happened. There are many areas where the smooth sailing gave way to stormy seas before ultimately settling down again. I moved from Brooklyn to Tucson to San Francisco to San Jose to Sunnyvale to Milpitas. As extensive as that list is, I know it's not over. Soon it will be time to move forward again, but in the meantime, I'm appreciating my parents' being back in America, and I'm grateful for the opportunity to live with them once more. Who knew that the four of us would finally settle here in the Bay Area again after being dispersed around the planet for half a decade?
Speaking of family, I've found a wonderful church to call home, something I haven't had in several years. Since coming to LSCC, my involvement has increased from a mere church-goer to an integral part of my small group and the worship team. Through church, I've met so many people and made several new friendships. You know you're cared for when people notice when you're not around!
As mentioned before, work had been an emotional roller coaster in 2011. It's pretty stable now, but I remember what a mess I was when things were down in the dumps and my bank was charging me fees for not having enough money in the account. Even though I'm immensely glad that's over, I know not to get too comfortable. Job security is not something I will take for granted again. Still, if I hadn't lost my job, I wouldn't have signed up for Netflix, and I wouldn't have randomly decided to pick up watching Star Trek. Oh my goodness, I wouldn't be the Star Trek nut that I am right now!
In regards to relationships, I've gone through two major breakups and learned much about who I am, what I can offer, what I look for in a significant other, and what my limits are when it comes to love. I learned not to cry too much over the past, and I learned that it's okay to make mistakes. I have also learned to let go of the internal constraints and pressures that I've subconsciously burdened upon myself. In the past, I've usually dated during a low or idle point in life, whether it's being the newcomer in a city, feeling lonely and inadequate from the momentary circumstances that surround me, or frankly, just out of plain boredom; however, 2013 marked the start of a revamping process of improving myself, including the addition of going to the gym on my daily list of things to do. I was determined to be happy and confident with myself from the inside out. As I got more involved with church, as work continued to keep me productive, as I filled my leisure with Star Trek and working out, I unexpectedly and serendipitously found someone new. For the first time, this isn't about being lonely or bored. Also for the first time, I'm dating an equal in humor, personality, interests, and values.
All this is to say, I got a new car with a low mileage cap, and while I should be careful how much I drive, I will not worry about it too much, because who knows where I'll be in a few months? What will life be like when I turn in this vehicle in 2016? Where will I have visited? Who will I have met? What accomplishments and goals will I have achieved? It's hard to keep the macro picture in mind sometimes, especially when things aren't going well, but life isn't a snapshot, even when things are looking up. I am optimistic for the future. I am scared but I am ready to walk out the door and into my new hybrid car. I will not watch the odometer; instead, I will watch the road, because there's no knowing where I'll be swept off to.
This is one of my favorite quotes. I adore it as a metaphor for life, whether Bilbo meant it as such. It embodies the mixed emotions of excitement, fear, and hopeful anticipation related to the start of new adventures. The best part about new adventures is that one can begin at any time. Every morning can be like this! Even though there are certain milestones in life that I planned for, like graduating from school, starting a new job, or moving to a new city across the country, often it's the unexpected twists and turns in life that (usually in retrospect) give so much character to my existence. Often, also, such new adventures begin with my making the willful decision to move toward a particular direction with a mindset like Dory's perceptive statement, "If you never let anything happen to [you], then nothing will ever happen to [you]."
These thoughts about life and adventures stem from events that happened over the weekend. On Saturday, I signed a 3-year lease for a brand new Prius C. It's a very cute car, smaller than my previous hatchback, and while driving a hybrid is different, I have been enjoying the change. I noticed that I'm paying more attention to my speedometer, and I'm continually amused by the tiny, animated illustration of how much power I'm using and charging. I've also noticed that I'm driving a whole lot before the fuel indicator eventually decreases by one tick, which is awesome; but the one particular thing that I'm paying most attention to is the odometer. In a nutshell, this new lease has a mileage cap that is less than my previous one; unintentionally, I accepted the terms without thoroughly calculating how much driving I will actually be doing.
Worrying about this situation and wondering if I should call the dealership to possibly extend my mileage, I suddenly remembered a nearly identical predicament that I was in 3 years ago when I signed the lease for the Scion XD. That same anxiety about going over my mileage was a big deal at the time, because I was living in San Jose and commuting everyday to Palo Alto for work. Little did I know that my job at Stanfurd would end after 4 short months, and that it would be 8 months of unemployment before I begin working at my current job in Sunnyvale, where I eventually moved. Needless to say, I didn't go over my mileage. In fact, when I turned her in, she was almost 20k below the limit. All that worrying turned out to be pointless and a waste of mental energy.
Life changes so quickly, so unexpectedly as it tends to do. Looking back on the last 3 years, so much has happened. There are many areas where the smooth sailing gave way to stormy seas before ultimately settling down again. I moved from Brooklyn to Tucson to San Francisco to San Jose to Sunnyvale to Milpitas. As extensive as that list is, I know it's not over. Soon it will be time to move forward again, but in the meantime, I'm appreciating my parents' being back in America, and I'm grateful for the opportunity to live with them once more. Who knew that the four of us would finally settle here in the Bay Area again after being dispersed around the planet for half a decade?
Speaking of family, I've found a wonderful church to call home, something I haven't had in several years. Since coming to LSCC, my involvement has increased from a mere church-goer to an integral part of my small group and the worship team. Through church, I've met so many people and made several new friendships. You know you're cared for when people notice when you're not around!
As mentioned before, work had been an emotional roller coaster in 2011. It's pretty stable now, but I remember what a mess I was when things were down in the dumps and my bank was charging me fees for not having enough money in the account. Even though I'm immensely glad that's over, I know not to get too comfortable. Job security is not something I will take for granted again. Still, if I hadn't lost my job, I wouldn't have signed up for Netflix, and I wouldn't have randomly decided to pick up watching Star Trek. Oh my goodness, I wouldn't be the Star Trek nut that I am right now!
In regards to relationships, I've gone through two major breakups and learned much about who I am, what I can offer, what I look for in a significant other, and what my limits are when it comes to love. I learned not to cry too much over the past, and I learned that it's okay to make mistakes. I have also learned to let go of the internal constraints and pressures that I've subconsciously burdened upon myself. In the past, I've usually dated during a low or idle point in life, whether it's being the newcomer in a city, feeling lonely and inadequate from the momentary circumstances that surround me, or frankly, just out of plain boredom; however, 2013 marked the start of a revamping process of improving myself, including the addition of going to the gym on my daily list of things to do. I was determined to be happy and confident with myself from the inside out. As I got more involved with church, as work continued to keep me productive, as I filled my leisure with Star Trek and working out, I unexpectedly and serendipitously found someone new. For the first time, this isn't about being lonely or bored. Also for the first time, I'm dating an equal in humor, personality, interests, and values.
All this is to say, I got a new car with a low mileage cap, and while I should be careful how much I drive, I will not worry about it too much, because who knows where I'll be in a few months? What will life be like when I turn in this vehicle in 2016? Where will I have visited? Who will I have met? What accomplishments and goals will I have achieved? It's hard to keep the macro picture in mind sometimes, especially when things aren't going well, but life isn't a snapshot, even when things are looking up. I am optimistic for the future. I am scared but I am ready to walk out the door and into my new hybrid car. I will not watch the odometer; instead, I will watch the road, because there's no knowing where I'll be swept off to.
Comments